Guess the book

"RallyWrench" (rndlitebmw)
10/03/2016 at 15:45 • Filed to: None

No cheating with those internets.

“The big car glided forward with murmurous motor, wheels crunching tin cans and plastic picnic plates on the berm, packed bearings sliding in the servile grease, the pistons, bathed in oil, slipping up and down in the firm but gentle grasp of cylinders, connecting rods to the crankshaft, crankshaft to the drive shaft through differential’s scrotal housing via axle, all power to the wheels.”

DISCUSSION (60)

Twingo Tamer - About to descend into project car hell. > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:47

How did you find my porn?!

RallyWrench > Twingo Tamer - About to descend into project car hell.
10/03/2016 at 15:47

Under my mattress. How’d it get there?

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:47

Crash?

RallyWrench > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
10/03/2016 at 15:49

Nope, never heard of/read it.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
10/03/2016 at 15:49

Oh shit, looked it up and know what it is. Kind of shocked I didn’t get it because I love that book.

BvdV - The Dutch Engineer > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:50

I have no clue, but I think I might need this book for research...

ttyymmnn > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:50

Bulwer-Lytton?

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:50

I looked up what it is. Kind of surprised I didn’t get it because I love that book. It was the tin can bit that should have made it more obvious to me. Check out Crash. It’s Ballard.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:51

thatsmyfetish.jpg

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > BvdV - The Dutch Engineer
10/03/2016 at 15:51

It’s not a car book, but still great.

RallyWrench > BvdV - The Dutch Engineer
10/03/2016 at 15:51

It’s a classic, but not at all about cars.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/03/2016 at 15:51

Read JG Ballard’s Crash then.

RallyWrench > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/03/2016 at 15:52

It’s referring to a MkIV Continental too.

Klaus Schmoll > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:53

I cheated.

Is it worth reading?

RallyWrench > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
10/03/2016 at 15:53

Kinja wouldn’t let me add a picture of the car in question as a hint. Man I love this book, I read a borrowed copy a long time ago and finally got my own.

RallyWrench > Klaus Schmoll
10/03/2016 at 15:54

Very much so.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > Klaus Schmoll
10/03/2016 at 15:54

Yes. So much yes. It will make you want to blow up a dam!

BvdV - The Dutch Engineer > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 15:56

With such a writing style I’d still read it, whatever the subject.

RallyWrench > ttyymmnn
10/03/2016 at 15:56

Nope, but looking that up I’m a little ashamed I didn’t know about the contest or its namesake.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > BvdV - The Dutch Engineer
10/03/2016 at 15:58

His descriptions of the American west are amazing. I really liked his last book as well even though it was so radically different from his other work.

RallyWrench > BvdV - The Dutch Engineer
10/03/2016 at 16:01

Me too, but it’s a bonus that his subject matter speaks to me.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:04

wat. no wai

RallyWrench > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
10/03/2016 at 16:04

Just looked up Crash, that sounds amazing, thanks.

S65 > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:06

50 Shades Of Grey

RallyWrench > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/03/2016 at 16:06

And and and that MkIV contains an acetylene torch and other implements of destruction. Right up your alley.

TheHondaBro > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:06

http://oppositelock.kinja.com/1787366914

EL_ULY > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:06

Kinja'd!!!

RallyWrench > S65
10/03/2016 at 16:09

That’s just insulting.

RallyWrench > TheHondaBro
10/03/2016 at 16:11

You guys are freaks.

Can I join?

S65 > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:13

Is the car in question a Cadillac?

Twingo Tamer - About to descend into project car hell. > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:14

;)

RallyWrench > S65
10/03/2016 at 16:15

To Benjamin Rolland’s dismay, it is not.

S65 > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:16

Heck, is it a Lotus?

RallyWrench > S65
10/03/2016 at 16:18

It is not.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:18

I’m going to have to wait until after I’ve replaced the teal damask to scotchguard the seats. Can you wait until then?

/ivealreadysaidtoomuch

S65 > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:18

What year was the book published?

ttyymmnn > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:19

Winner of the 2005 Bulwer-Lytton contest:

“As he stared at her ample bosom, he daydreamed of the dual Stromberg carburetors in his vintage Triumph Spitfire, highly functional yet pleasingly formed, perched prominently on top of the intake manifold, aching for experienced hands, the small knurled caps of the oil dampeners begging to be inspected and adjusted as described in chapter seven of the shop manual.

Dan McKay, Fargo, ND

RallyWrench > S65
10/03/2016 at 16:19

1975, if I’m not mistaken.

RallyWrench > ttyymmnn
10/03/2016 at 16:20

I could get into that, deeply.

Mercedes Streeter > S65
10/03/2016 at 16:21

That’s the perfect answer to the question: “Describe the auto industry in 4 words?”

RallyWrench > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/03/2016 at 16:23

I guess I’ll have to.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:24

It’s only a matter of time now until you start making cold minimalist synthpop tracks about dehumanization.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 16:29

Kinja'd!!!

I actually got out to the car over the weekend and worked on getting accurate info for the rocker repair. <-See awesome Paint diagram. Blue I can buy/alter, Green I will make, stuff in ovals is what happens when the connection on the inside does fucky things, and - as you can see - my repair will Just Be Better.

Given that (originally) that center plate actually weaves back and forth and that the bottom of the rocker on the original is a complex stamping with ups and downs that’s 8' long, these things were as crack-y as anything Ford has ever done.

RallyWrench > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/03/2016 at 16:42

Since that looks to be the most diabolical series of panel joins in the history of the automobile, it looks like your fix will simplify and strengthen it without trying too hard. Wonder why they made it so?

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 17:05

Kinja'd!!!

If I had to guess, I’d say a mixture of the above and adding post-facto a second “chassis rail” on the inside of the outer one to compensate for noodle-like body characteristics. That was a thing from the prototype Baby’s First Three Ton Unibody to the actual ‘58 production models. As to why it complicated past that point, I can only assume it was “we have a body press lol” and wanting to get more strength out of pieces while still doing them in 20GA body steel.

A couple of the things, though, seem to suggest doing some of the things to reduce weight.

What.

That center rib? The one that joins the top and bottom, stabilizes the bottom join, etc. etc.? It has a whole series of swaged 2" round holes and ribs so it can be as light as possible. On a 5300lb car. FORD WHAT THE FUCK

Oh yeah, and the outer true rocker panel piece (not the cover) has a 1/4" or so gap it leaves to the outer cover *except* where it meets the door post and the front/rear fenders. “Oh, leave a space so the workers can work the cover in and out to be completely straight but use an extra stamp process BEFORE YOU FOLD IT to make sure it lines up with something.” This of course means that the rocker tread plate has a screw landing right where the metal on the inside curves, so it goes through two thicknesses of metal an eighth inch apart. Ha ha, fuck you, trim design guy.

shop-teacher > RallyWrench
10/03/2016 at 20:03

I got nothin’

RallyWrench > shop-teacher
10/03/2016 at 20:35

Neither did anyone else, haha. In fairness, I wouldn’t have known it until I read it a couple of nights ago.

RallyWrench > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/03/2016 at 20:41

I now know so much more about Lincoln Capris than I ever thought I would. Not sure that’s a good thing, but I’m sure it’ll come in handy at the next “drink beer with randos who find out I’m a car guy” meet. This kind of shit Just Doesn’t Happen in (old) German cars, which are no fun and I have wasted my life with. Such new fun and trivia with ‘Merican iron.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > RallyWrench
10/04/2016 at 09:21

I’ve observed before that GM design when it fucks up tends to be *stupid*, whereas Ford design when it fucks up tends to be *insane*/drunk. I think it comes from different internal design philosophies, at least it did back into the ‘60s/’70s. GM’s would be something like “find a good way to make this cheaper and reduce parts” - result: things like the same power steering pump on a vast range of engines, with different brackets that are sometimes really fucked up, or mounting the alternator to a tang on the exhaust manifold.

Ford’s would be something like “find a way to make this that uses a part in a different way! Be creative!” - result: things like Falcon wagons using the sedan fuel tank upside-down, common dash internals across models with different fascia, and things like the above and how Mercury Comets are just a Falcon underneath with the sheet metal assembled differently. The giant late ‘50s Mercury models and Lincoln use the same hood latch, except the Lincoln uses two - coincidentally like the A/C evaporators. BECAUSE THE LINCOLN IS BIGGER

Basically, if GM can get the job done with a simple new part or a simple tweak on an existing part, they do it regardless of whether it creates a clusterfuck. If Ford can get the job done with a new part that’s “cool”, is made out of three separate simple parts, or an old part doing something loony, they do that regardless whether there was a simple solution.

Both these approaches are completely different than German cars, because every single solution on the typical German car looks focus-grouped. Sterile. More complicated than it needs to be, but tends to do its job - because everybody on the design team had input and leaving the fix to just one Golden Boy new part-designing wizard is Not Allowed. This can make die Deutsche harder to work on, too...

If you compare the approaches to comedy storytelling, the Germans are the stand-up comic who relentlessly hones every joke, works overtime on mastering his timing, and while he’s kind of funny on stage has a hunted look in his eye and you kind of wonder if you might get murdered in your sleep if you don’t laugh. Some of the jokes seem to depend on something *he* thinks is funny, but just ring kind of odd. By contrast, the US automakers are the guy telling stories at the country store’s front porch - they’ve got a solid repertoire of stories that get laughs, they’ve mastered them over twenty years of hanging out, and they know what works. Even if it’s rough around the edges and some of the punchlines are really fuckin’ dumb. Past getting the laugh, they Do Not Give A Fuck.

Future next gen S2000 owner > RallyWrench
10/04/2016 at 12:43

Brazzers?

RallyWrench > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/04/2016 at 12:44

I had to share that with Oppo, it was too good. The Ford technique must go way back, I did a load of mechanical work on a ‘48 Continental, and it had dual floor heaters with fans, the starter motor and hydraulic pump motor for the top and windows were the same part, but the hydro motor was under the dash, operated by a lever that closed a contact. Definitely a little fucky.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/04/2016 at 12:46

I always found GM design flaws to be more lazy than stupid.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > RallyWrench
10/04/2016 at 12:46

If you think about how McNamara came out of that background - the “IT’S NOT WORKING! CLEVERNESS AT IT HARDER!” insanity - the Kennedy/Johnson foreign policies make a lot more sense.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
10/04/2016 at 12:49

Column A, column B. When two parts are occupying the same space that shouldn’t be (because putting things where they should be is HAAARD), whether the designer refused to imagine a better solution or literally couldn’t doesn’t matter too much.

RallyWrench > Future next gen S2000 owner
10/04/2016 at 12:53

How did you know?

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/04/2016 at 13:02

Alternatively, it could be that they chose the option least likely to end before a committee.

Future next gen S2000 owner > RallyWrench
10/04/2016 at 13:04

I’ve seen it. A few times.......for ummmmm.......research.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie
10/04/2016 at 13:04

Or that. The GM design philosophy (classic), when it works, it works. See: SBC. Rugged simplicity. When they fail to account for something because dumb, watch out. I actually prefer working on Ford things because they keep me entertained better during the job...

Birddog > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht
10/04/2016 at 13:14

“and things like the above and how Mercury Comets are just a Falcon underneath with the sheet metal assembled differently”

Kind of like how the E body Eldorado, Toronado and Riviera shared the same body shell between FWD and RWD cars? Or how the Y body Corvair, Skylark, Tempest, and F85 were all the same but totally different? Or the A bodies, B bodies, C bodies etc..

What looks like “fucked up” was actually necessary because GM had 4 divisions building cars that at some point all competed against each other on some level.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Birddog
10/04/2016 at 13:20

No, I get all of that. What makes the Comet weird is actually where it’s different. “Let’s assemble the pieces so that it makes it 2" longer, because of reasons.”